When you read the headline, Convicted Killer Denied parole, what do you honestly think? But what if the headline would have said, Robert Gardner denied parole, that has a different feel doesn’t it. The inmates that we bus to our church on Sunday mornings live at the work release center, to give them a chance to begin re-integration into society as they have a possible parole date coming. When someone is sentenced for their crime, they are given a range of dates for their sentence. So if someone is given 10-20 years, they may only be in for seven years and if they do well inside (follow the rules, take classes, follow their program), they will be allowed to get out of prison and be on parole. When someone is on parole they are still serving time, they are monitored by a parole officer but they are able to live and work in society. For some of our friends, the parole hearing is very stressful, most have lots of anxiety as they sit before three judges to hear their charges read again and answer questions about why they should be allowed to be released on parole. As a church community we try to attend parole hearings as a show of support for our members. On February 26th, my husband and father-in-law were attending parole hearings at the work release center.
I was very excited because that day because some of the men getting out were paroling to our R12 house (the new transition house) and also Robert was paroling, and while he had found other arrangements I made him promise he would be spending time at our house when he got out. Robert had attended our church faithfully for the past year. He was a staple in our community, attentive, helpful, respectful and genuine. I was eager to see him free. There is a look on someone’s face when they get out of prison that is just amazing, sometimes it takes a few days to set in because the first day they just walk around looking like they are about to puke. (the world is a scary place when you have been hidden in an institution) But by the time I see them on Sunday, most of them are glowing with the freedom, like a bride on their wedding day.
I was waiting for my husband’s call, you can’t have your phone while you are at the hearings and you never know what order they will go in, as I knew Jon was staying for 3 hearings, I knew he could be gone for a long time. When he called, I did not expect to hear what he told me. In the past most of the time when our friends went before the board, they got out that day, sometimes they had to wait a couple of months and then they got out. However, Robert was not only denied parole he was sent back to the diagnostics and evaluation center, he was removed from work release and sent back to prison. His job that he had had for a year would be over, his plans for a residence were gone, his daughter’s dreams of being with her father were dashed.
The family of the boy that Robert killed came to the hearing and brought the media. They had not forgiven Robert and they did not want to see him out on parole. And just like that, a “convicted killer was denied parole”. But that wasn’t just a “convicted killer” that was a man who had spent 20 years in prison for his crime committed as a minor, who had been following all the rules, holding down a job and being a part of our church, gone...to do more time, because the past 20 years wasn’t enough.
That day was the first time Robert was able to tell the family that he was sorry for what he had done. When he was taken away, he turned to my father-in-law and said, “I was able to finally say that I was sorry”. He had longed to do that for so many years, but he pled guilty to his crime
without going to trial, so the family never had to testify and in the state of Nebraska it is illegal for a person convicted of murder to contact the family of his victims. It protects the family from being “re-victimized”.
In the news article it said “The victim's family say they weren't ready for him to be released, but after hearing his apology they can finally start to heal and open lines of communication with Gardner in the future.” It is my prayer that they will keep the lines of communication open and that they will work on their forgiveness, so that next time Robert is up for parole he can return to our community and finally get to start his new life.
My husband was set to preach that Sunday. He had been previously assigned to speak on Luke 5:12-16 where Jesus touches the Leper. He told us about leper colonies and showed us pictures of what lepers look like, he talked about the meaning behind the fact that Jesus told the Leper he healed to go and present himself to the priest, so that he could be fully restored to the community. Then Jon talked about how some of us have been cast out of society, that the inmates among us have been moved away from a society that says they are unacceptable. How can they be restored? There has to be a healing that can be offered that can restore these people back into society, surely my friend Robert’s whole identity will NOT forever be the sum of his worst act, he will not forever just be a “convicted killer”.
Jon then asked us to write letters, letters to the parole board asking for them to change their mind on Robert’s case and also writing to Robert to tell him, to keep his courage up. To keep seeking God and doing good, even in the wake of this injustice, even in the wake of a society, of parents of his victim that say, he is still the same 17 year old kid who made a terrible mistake.
I have wondered about telling you how much I felt this was an injustice. I have wondered how many of our readers will think I am off my rocker, defending a man who has killed another man. The truth be told, I learned long ago at our church, that a person who has killed another person is still a person. Still a child of God, still someone who needs love and encouragement to live out the call that God has on his or her life. Robert, may you know we are praying for you and looking forward to the day you can be restored to our community.
God please continue to help those who are still incarcerated to know that they are NOT just the sum of their worst crime. God please continue to heal the identity of those at our church. If you are willing please make us clean.
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